Living my Life

My way

I really should call him…

We have to get together…

I feel guilty for not inviting them over…

WAIT!

Why do I have to call him?

Why do I have to initiate the plans?

I’ve never been invited over!

Why does someone feel the need to actually make you feel guilty for their inability to  take action? When they are in the wrong, why do they turn it around on you? I’m tired of people making you feel this way. The guilt you put on youself for not being able to make everybody happy is exhausting. How can someone else make you feel like such a failure in life because you’re not acting or doing what they want you to do? Is it their goal to tear you down because you’re happy and they aren’t? If you aren’t included, maybe there is a reason.

There are friends and family members that go months and even years before seeing each other and they don’t make each other feel that way. That’s unconditional love or friendship.

Have you ever been in a relationship where you clearly know you are in the right, but they make you doubt yourself? They know what they are doing wrong, or maybe they don’t. The only thing that makes them feel better is making you feel worse. They’ll call you names, give you the silent treatment, shut you out, and make you feel like you have no right to be thinking of yourself or your happiness. “You’re selfish”, they’ll say. You’ll start to believe them and wonder what’s wrong with you.

I’m Selfish? I should be doing more.

Am I selfish? I thought I was doing all I could. I would like to have some time for the things I want, but I guess I should be trying harder to make others happy and trying to fix their lives.

I think I might be selfish. I’m finally making the choices I want and doing the things I want.

You know what…

I’M SELFISH!

I deserve to be happy, to have it all, to put myself first. There are things I’ve been through, lives I’ve lived, relationships I’ve survived, and things I’ll never share with anyone. Nobody knows what another person is experiencing or where they might be in their life, or what they can or cannot take on at that moment. This is my one and only life, and my time is getting shorter and shorter. I don’t want to take life for granted. If there is something I want, I’m gonna go for it!

People, live your lives with no apology! Don’t let anyone make you feel less than you are. If you feel it in your heart and bones that someone is wrong, believe it. Be happy, know you can do it all, with no apologies.

JUST BE YOU!

 

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A Different Kind of Tattoo…

Oh, the planning involved for the perfect tattoo. What do I want, where should I put it, what does it mean to me and on and on and on. I have so many saved ideas of my next one, but until it’s perfectly decided it will be put on hold.

After we’ve placed that piece of permanent art on our bodies, we’re proud! We want to show it off and are glad to answer questions about what it means. Each one has a meaning, a story to go with it, it’s a symbol or personal statement.

I have 7 tattoos that were all carefully thought out, but two that I had no choice in. A two inch “permanent frown”, as I call it and another two inch “zipper”; both a result of surgery. If they were visible, I would talk about them. As with our favorite tattoos, each scar has a special meaning, a story to go with it, a lesson learned, a sign of healing and survival. Why wouldn’t you want to talk about that?

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Was there pain involved? Probably, and maybe still.
Some are worse than others, in places we don’t want to look at. Hideous and embarrassing, I’ve heard it said. But why? You now have yet another marking that makes you totally unique, something you didn’t have before? Isn’t that a good thing?

 

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As we move along in this world we accumulate all kinds of things that mar our insides and outsides. Bumps and bruises, freckles and laugh lines, friends and enemies, broken hearts and unfulfilled promises. We all have the same things, some choose to show all and others try to cover and hide. All signs of an exciting, fun filled, sometimes scary, unpredictable life that we decided to live out to the fullest.

Next time someone is staring at you and you know they want to ask what happened, just realize they want to hear a good one. Tell them, “See this? This was a doosey!” Give them your story or your words of wisdom. See if they have any, I’m sure they do. If you think they are looking at you with pity, they’re probably thinking how strong and brave you must be; a warrior for sure!

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When I see someone with any kind of, I’ll call it “life induced markings” on their body, I want to hear the story. How did it happen? How did you survive? Would I be that strong? I have an admiration and sense of awe for them. I see them as those special inspirational people that were put before me to raise my game, to know if they can do it so can I.

Ask any tattoo artist how excited they are when they see some virgin skin walking in or a painter with a blank canvas. You can’t leave it that way for long, who wants to look at a blank page? Fill it up, mark it up, make it something to talk about!

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Friday Favorite

Great Advice

Humble and Kind
Tim McGraw


 

You know there’s a light that glows by the front door
Don’t forget the key’s under the mat
When childhood stars shine,
Always stay humble and kind

Go to church ’cause your mamma says to
Visit grandpa every chance that you can
It won’t be wasted time
Always stay humble and kind

Hold the door, say “please”, say “thank you”
Don’t steal, don’t cheat, and don’t lie
I know you got mountains to climb
But always stay humble and kind

When the dreams you’re dreamin’ come to you
When the work you put in is realized
Let yourself feel the pride
But always stay humble and kind

Don’t expect a free ride from no one
Don’t hold a grudge or a chip and here’s why:
Bitterness keeps you from flyin’
Always stay humble and kind

Know the difference between sleeping with someone
And sleeping with someone you love
“I love you” ain’t no pick-up line
So always stay humble and kind

Hold the door, say “please”, say “thank you”
Don’t steal, don’t cheat, and don’t lie
I know you got mountains to climb
But always stay humble and kind

When those dreams you’re dreamin’ come to you
When the work you put in is realized
Let yourself feel the pride
But always stay humble and kind

When it’s hot, eat a root beer popsicle
Shut off the AC and roll the windows down
Let that summer sun shine
Always stay humble and kind

Don’t take for granted the love this life gives you
When you get where you’re going don’t forget turn back around
And help the next one in line
Always stay humble and kind

Acceptable

From my very wise friend.

faith - no filter

I wish you could see it through my eyes sometimes.

How hard it really can be.

But if I talk about it, if I tell you my truth, it makes it worse.

Maybe you have some idea, maybe you have lived it too? Lived with that uncomfortable feeling that you need to hide that vulnerable part – the real you.
Every day, news headlines and blog posts and Facebook memes, lump us all together. Being who I am, who I was born to be, is now synonymous with some pretty awful labels.
I’m not. I’m not those things, but it doesn’t matter. So often I find myself on the wrong side of what society deems acceptable.
I typically hide my views, my opinions and my pain.
Because, yes, it causes pain.
Why is it acceptable, in this day and age, for everyone to be anything they want to be —…

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